Cave

Another revelation today, since we are technically still on the love month this is another love thing blog, I've become officially jaded when it comes to courting. This realization became affirmative after chatting with a former officemate. What happened to me is I think just a product of all the years of finding (more of failing to find) the one.

I lost the thrill of chasing for someone I like to like me in return. It is not entirely true, specially in our culture, that the girl who you like who really likes you also will just nod and be in a relationship with you when asked. No! No matter how many times you seen it on TV dramas and movies, it is not a representation of the real world! Unless maybe if you have the body and looks of a Hollywood star i.e Channing Tatum then you can get a free pass, make that an express pass to smooch land.

In the reality I live in, you have to express your desire for someone, make it known to them. They may repel you and drop the F-bomb (friendship thing) on you but this should not stop you from chasing them. Of course there are exceptions for every rule, but majority says that the girls just want to be appreciated more, you should show your love more, more and more of more. You can feel that your effort is affecting her by the way she responds to your requests, gifts or mere presence.

I got a story I've personaly witnessed weeks ago while commuting on a jeep. The girl sitting next to me is this pretty thin fair highschool girl. Sitting on her left side is this college guy with glasses and says he does not know Cebu or the language. I was seated on the girl's right side. The jeep was packed that time so I clearly heared the entire conversation.

Guy: Ms, excuse me what is the meaning of "kinsa?"
Girl: (stunned at first but politely answered) "who"
Guy: how about "asa "
Girl: "where"
Now this is where it goes from being a stranger asking for his way to creepy this could possibly be a maniac at loose.
Guy: you in college?
Girl: in high school
Guy: you have facebook?
Girl: ( caught by surprise) Ahm what???
Guy: facebook do you?

The girl gave her fb details, to which the guy promptly saved on his cellphone. Then he ask if she could be searched and the girl said that her account is private. After a moment, the guy said "lugar lang" in perfect Cebuano, accents and all - I know being a local that the guy speaks Bisaya - that he just pretended not to speak Bisaya to strike a conversation with the girl and get her details. It was such a move that made a grin on my face when I realized what was happening.

That is precisely the thing I lost, the courage to put myself out in the open, or to just try to chase someone I like, to make an effort, to make an impression that "hey lady I have a thing for you, and I can make you a fire using sticks!" I lost that feeling in my cave where there's no fire burning for such a long time now.